Enlightened Indoor Rock Climbing

On a beautiful August morning, my husband and I decided to go indoor rock climbing for the first time. I almost didn’t go. I was rather exhausted and was experiencing some hardcore menstrual pains that were in full force. Initially, I decided to pass but then after thinking that I was really only going to sit at home wishing I was there, I got dressed and said lets do this.

After checking in, getting our shoes and orienting ourselves around the space, it was time to climb. We did some warm ups and some easy climbs to get us used to how to use our body to climb and fall in case we needed to. Then it was time for some higher climbs, attached to a harness on an auto-belay. The first one was decently tough, I made it about 75% up and took a fall after missing a hold. The second one was even tougher and I had an incredibly interesting moment while I was many feet up, deciding how to get to the top. My first thought was ‘I got far enough, this is satisfactory, you can jump down if you want to.’ But then I decided against that. I decided that I would spend time there trying to figure it out. And that’s when things got fascinating. My mind went completely clear. It was as if I didn’t even realize how high I was or what I was doing anymore. I only focused on the task of finding out how to complete this climb. After about a minute, I figured it out and got to the top. I was amazed. Not so much by the physical challenge, but by what happened to me psychologically and emotionally in that split instant. My mind cleared out every thought, my body didn’t feel any pain or physical strain, and I felt absolutely no fear. I was so focused and so present that the answer came to me in a matter of seconds. And again, I didn’t think, I just acted and I got to the top. It was only when I got to the bottom that I felt my body start to shake and my breathing labored. I didn’t feel any of that while I was up there discovering the path needed to get to the top.

This made me think of how many times in my life that I have given in to the thought ‘this is good enough, it’s ok to stop now.’ What have I been missing when I listen to this thought? When I give in to the defeat or the guise of something being satisfactory enough? Why am I labeling something satisfactory and deciding that it’s time to give up? How did my mind get so clear? So much so that when I landed, it was as if my mind decided to start “working” again, flooded with all kinds of thoughts reacting to my experience and my bodily sensations. How can I feel that again in my daily life?

I did a few more climbs after that, reveling in the clarity of mind that I was experiencing as I was climbing.  Upon returning home, I felt grateful for the experience, but also curious as to why I haven’t experienced that level of clarity, of pure focus, of pure persistence in the task after actively rejecting that thought of ‘it’s ok you don’t have to finish.’ I’ve had a lot of practice in persistence. I completed my Ph.D. in my 20’s and unlike a lot of my peers, sacrificed on many nights to not go out and instead stay home and study. I have a really good understanding and practice of delayed gratification just due to pursuing my career. I also meditate regularly and don’t typically experience that level of present focus and clarity in those meditative moments. I also exercise regularly, 3-4 days a week strength training with some yoga in between, but I don’t typically feel the level of peace, clarity, present focus and adrenaline rush during my usual exercise. So what was it?

I think this speaks to doing something new for the very first time, and something that requires all of your focus and your physical body. Yes, I experienced an adrenaline rush, and according to Oprah.com, your brain releases dopamine when you are learning something new. Dopamine is responsible for making us feel pleasure and satisfaction because it activates the reward system. I certainly felt that as well. Science tells us that exercise helps improve our focus, even for up to two hours post exercise and that it enhances our creativity, allowing us to come up with creative solutions to problems. I experienced all of this but to the 10th degree. And it was exhilarating. Experiencing these psychological and emotional effects also allowed me to reflect upon how other tasks and activities leave us feeling the opposite, not allowing us to feel clarity and present focus (i.e. scrolling on my phone). This experience has given me the motivation to make a conscious effort to do less of the tasks and activities that take away my sense of clarity and being present, and invest in doing things that reinforce those feelings (i.e. meditating, journaling, exercising, trying new things for the first time).  It has given me the motivation and psychological imprint to notice that when I have the thought ‘this is good enough, you can give up now,’ to pause, to question this, to see if I can go past this to see what I can get on the other side. The other part I learned is that, I might fall. But that doesn’t compare to the laser focus and cleansing of the mind you get as a function of going past what you think your limit is. And even if you do fall, you’ll get a taste of what it’s like to keep going, to move past the point in your mind that you think is good enough. Because sometimes good enough is just that, something that doesn’t bring you to a higher level of consciousness or greatness. And who knew that indoor rock climbing could do such a thing? Next time you’re thinking about doing something new, don’t sit at home contemplating whether or not you should. Do yourself a favor and get dressed, eat a nourishing meal, and send yourself on your way. You might just find yourself a little more enlightened when you’re done.